The Tony Awards

I wasn't going to blog about the Tonys because most people I know don't watch them. I guess it's because not everyone can go up to NYC and see a bunch of shows and care. It's easier to plunk down $10 to see another movie. And a lot of folks aren't fans of characters singing and dancing for no reason at all, unless they are cartoons. But, it's usually one of the more entertaining and better produced shows, so why not.

The first number is the cast of The Book of Mormon doing their opening number "Hello" and starts with the cast ringing on the dressing rooms of celebs like Ricky Martin, Judith Light (from Who's the Boss!!), and James Earl Jones (yes, Darth Vader is a Broadway guy). I'm afraid what a musical about Southern Baptists would be like? (The Cookbook of Fried Chicken & Pie?). Neil Patrick Harris is the host again and his opening joke was funny. It's good that he loves theater and enjoys hosting and being on Broadway. His opening number is "What Is Life Were Just Like Theater". That is something to think about. I don't think my arthritis could allow me to dance like that. I'd ache. Very fun opening number. PLUS, they just cut to a shot of Emma Stone in the audience. AWESOME! Judith Light, aka Angela from Who's the Boss just won a Tony. Cool! And you thought Tony Danza was the acting talent carrying that show, wrong! Now here's the youngest Jonas, sounding sort of odd I must say, introducing the performance from Newsies. Yup, that forgotten musical with Christian Bale is now a stage musical. And WOW can they dance. I think I pulled a hamstring watching them. I'm guessing in context, the kid with a crutch makes sense.

Amanda Seyfried is here looking creepy and because she was in Mamma Mia and will be in Les Miserables. How long until they do a musical of Mean Girls? Don't steal my idea dang it! Now best revival of a musical nominee, Follies. It's very showy, but out of context it's a bit over the top. Surely this wasn't the best representation of the show. Going into work mode, it's always interesting to see which advertisers are featured in big events.

Back to the show, a performance from Ghost: The Musical. Yep, another movie turned into a musical. And they wisely kept Unchained Melody. The ghost is bathed in blue light, he kinda looks like a smurf or Violet from Willy Wonka. The allegedly evil guy had a sunken cheek. Is he a vampire or malnourished? It was a short and slightly confusing performance. What other movies would make good musicals? I'll get back with ya. Diane Sawyer's husband wins from directing Death of a Salesman with Philip Seymour Hoffman and the new Spider-Man. Now a performance of Jesus Christ Superstar. The guy singing Judas in this sounds the best of anyone so far tonight. The video screens are odd though. He's as charismatic as any TV preacher, but his backup dancers seem oddly static. SPIDER-MAN COMMERCIAL!!

Angela Lansbury came onstage telling about theater. She's almost 90 and still going. She's the Betty White of Broadway. Now the guy from Smash just beat the new Spider-Man for a Tony. Now the annoying teacher from Glee introduces the Gershwin revue (which means a musical featuring previous songs) Nice Work If You Can Get It. It has Matthew Broderick in it. They just did a montage of the year in plays. It was pretty good. Tough presenting clips from plays out of context.

Sheryl Crow is presenting the award for best score. Why her? Well, she just wrote a score for a new musical, Diner, based on the 80s classic. Cool huh? Now, a performance from the groundbreaking Porgy and Bess. Audra McDonald singing Summertime is sheer brilliance. Now, a performance of Once. I want to see this. I still haven't seen the movie, but the music from it is awesome, including the brilliant Oscar winning Falling Slowly. Now, Evita, featuring Ricky Martin. Most only know this from the Madonna movie. This is the first Broadway production to actually have an Argentine Evita. They were smart to showcase Ricky in this. He is the name. Surprised they didn't go with the best known song "Don't Cry For Me Argentina". Evita however looks like a blonde version of the Frau lady from Austin Powers. But c'mon, it's Evita, have Evita sing something. Although with Patti LuPone in the audience, that would have to be intimidating.

Now Corbin Bleu, who was in High School Musical, now looks to be in a high school production of Godspell. This is one where they go down the aisles and seem to want to get the audience involved. Most of the time, I really don't like that. I paid good money, YOU SING, I don't need to see some strangers sing. Now, a performance of Hairspray. This is an old show, why are they showing it? Well, money. It is being performed on Royal Caribbean cruise line. RC has been advertising throughout the show. It's all about money kids. Sales people will use whatever creative methods they can to get a client to sponsor and give your station money. Trust me, I know this. I deal with media sales every day. Thankfully, it wasn't too obvious and cheesy. Now the final nominated musical, Leap of Faith. This is the ONLY nomination for this musical. It has already closed or scheduled to close. It's the little seen musical based on the little seen Steve Martin movie from 1992 about a sham preacher. Yeah, I didn't think you'd remember it either.

All in all not a bad show. It's good to see what shows will be headed our way over the next few years. Hope you enjoyed it. Check out the performances on YouTube. I'm sure most of them will be there.

MTV Movie Awards Blog #2

Russell Brand is unfunny again, now Kristen Stewart & Chris Hemsworth from Snow White are presenting Best Female Performance. Kristen Stewart always comes across as the most miserable person on the face of the earth. Why are you so unhappy, girl? Do you think Twilight sucks too? Jennifer Lawrence won for Hunger Games, and she was awesome in Hunger Games. And now, Charlie Sheen. He has always looked skeezy and nasty and like he was doing something he shouldn't. He is cementing the movie "Project X" (not the lab chimp movie from the 80s with Matthew Broderick and Helen Hunt) as an "Instant Cult Movie" or some such nonsense. Now Wiz Khalifa is performing. I admit, I had to look up how to spell his name because I'm mad white. Are they throwing toilet paper across the stage? Is this taking place at Toomer's Corner?

Now Adam Sandler Andy Samberg and some chick introduce best kiss. Adam Sandler seems like an embarrassing drunk uncle these days. Andy Samberg should just be embarrassed. And the winner is Twilight. Next.

Teen Moms, Snooki & JWoww? This is what my MTV has come to? Why? Now Joe Perry & Steven Tyler come out as a living PSA against tanning and drugs. No? They aren't? Oh, they are here to present the Generation Award to Johnny Depp. I have to say though, except for Edward Scissorhands, I'm not a Johnny Depp fan. I don't get him. Plus, he looks greasy. And he's sitting in with the Black Keys? Why do all actors think they are rock stars? I don't get it. Johnny Depp is gutsy apparently. Who knew playing the same role in every Tim Burton movie was gutsy? Sorry, just not a fan.

This show is dragging like a slow work day. The Joel McHale sketch wasn't too bad, mainly because it didn't have Russell Brand. Now fake sexism from Fassbender and then Charlize kicking his butt. This award is for Best Fight. The winner is NOT TWILIGHT but Hunger Games. Thankfully I like Hunger Games. Wow, Josh Hutcherson is tiny, or else those on stage are behemoths.

Wait, Jessica Biel is in the new Total Recall movie? They still let her act? Just put a picture of her in the corner for those who want to see her. Best cast should go to Bridesmaids or The Help but it actually goes to Harry Potter. I guess I can handle that. Harry Potter won for Best Hero. I guess saving the wizarding world is a good reason.

Dear MTV, these teen moms obviously have had trouble making good decisions in life. I don't think putting them on TV and having them in celeb magazines is going to help them in that regard. Cancel that show please. K, Thanks.

Matthew McHoweverYouSpellHisName and Channing Tatum are actually funny together present best on-screen transformation. Channing Tatum is a funny guy. The winner is Elizabeth Banks from The Hunger Games. MTV should be happy that Elizabeth is filthy minded haha.

Now Emma Stone receives the inaugural Trailblazer award from some actress I've never heard of. I'm happy though because I think she's awesome. This film of what stars think of her is hilarious! Also, MTV, it's not First Annual. It can't be First Annual. It can be First, or Inaugural, but it can't be annual until it's happened more than once. Turns out the actress I didn't know was in Superbad. She played Michael Cera's love interest. Wow, she really didn't break out at all did she? Bless her heart.

Ooh, Dark Knight clip time. YES!!

Jodie Foster, why are you there? You deserve so much better. But I have to say, you look great. Twilight won, how ridiculous. I sat through this show to have that wretched waste of celluloid win it? Kids who voted for this, please have someone take you to see good movies or have people tell you good movies to rent on Netflix.

OK kids, that's it. I lost at least 25 IQ points, if not more.

MTV Movie Awards Blog #1

Well kids, it's time for another awards show, this time it's the MTV Movie Awards. They are starting off with fun. singing there pervasive hit "We Are Young". This is gonna be a hot mess show, I can already tell. How, you may ask? Well, #1 I saw Vanilla Ice in the audience. #2 The guys from fun. are wearing white tux jackets, trimmed in black, and what can best be described as Mary Tyler Moore's capri pants from The Dick Van Dyke Show. They would have been better off switching tuxes with Janelle Monae. #3, Russell Brand is hosting. I'm already predicting he'll be awful. An easy prediction, he'll look like he needs a flea dip.

Here he is, flea dip prediction is true. Really, Mayan 2012 jokes are still being made? Sheen is there? Really? Ugh. Plus, he has to remind me he's in the Rock of Ages movie, which looks looks awful and I loved the stage production. I'm not sure what's more annoying and painful, Russell Brand or my psoriatic arthritis. Tough call. Now Mila Kunis and a high school history teacher, wait that's Mark Wahlberg, come out to present the award for On Screen Dirtbag and have to do a horrible intro about famous good people who are actually dirtbags. They were embarrassed, I was embarrassed for them and for the fact that Jennifer Aniston now has an MTV Movie Award. Bryce Dallas Howard was ROBBED! If you keep encouraging her, she'll never go back to TV where she belongs.

Thank goodness, EMMA STONE! And the latest British actor to come to the US to play an American superhero. Truly, this is an immigration problem. Lou Dobbs needs to be consulted. Emma is still awesome, even when cussing on here. She's got great comic timing. The winner for breakthrough performance is Shailene Woodley from The Descendants. She was really good in that movie, even if she started on that ABC Family show where she played a pregnant teen, and even if she did give a bit of a pretentious speech, bless her. Wait, time for another commercial already? Ugh, I hate dealing with commercials. Wait, I make my living from commercials. Nevermind, commercials are AWESOME!

Now, the 3 leads from a movie I am very much looking forward to, Perks of Being a Wallflower (truly a wonderful book, trailer looked great). Best male performance goes to NOT TWILIGHT!! and instead to Josh Hutcherson (although I would have put him #5 in that category). Really though, one award then a commercial? The producers really need to plan better.

OK, that'll do for section 1. On to section 2!!